America has everything…but LOVE.
i have yet ever seen so much 2% beauty and 98% ugliness in relationships till i set foot on the American soil. we all are not ignorant; we read books, magazines, self-help books, watch t.v., movies, and listen to music about this thing called Love. we, as humans, are known for being fallible and flawed and we believe too much in the concept of love, but we still are our own clowns and circus.
i grew up outside America, in a small country where marriage has been looked at as a covenant rather than a routine. and this has been more than just plain tradition, but rather a way of life for more than old centuries. although modern age comes to us each day, and a new change seems to get introduced every waking moment, the endless debate of love has been on going like war for ages. but nothing has ever prepared me for this when i saw the American culture in relationships.
it seems that this beautiful gift which is bestowed upon us is just being taken way too far for granted everyday and it’s becoming more of a game. using people to get sex and have what we want, the selfish pleasures, all the insecurities we feel, the boredom, the loneliness, the inferiorities, using people to create unnecessary drama in our already good relationships, using people for just the thrill and manipulation, the feeling of power…you name it. but for what? it’s all for nothing. we try to build something out of attraction then we mistaken it for love when it’s really just using someone for our own benefits.
when i first realized this, i just shook my head and said, “wow… and so it is true. this is what freedom really is.”
i don’t intend to offend anyone or the American culture, simply because this is just based on plain observations and experience. but i just had to ask you this: Why is your view of loving so polluted? why can’t you be content with just one person and just offer all you’ve got to him/her, instead of looking for flair and pleasure all the time?
why do we create this? why do we look for happiness, when happiness is actually through looking into the eyes of that person you love? why do we cheat? from where i came from, i didn’t even know what cheating really was. it’s even viewed as a taboo there. people would look at you like you got the plague when passing by the street.
and i’m not going to lie, because the American culture had actually rubbed off on me too. and now i hate it. i hate what i’ve become. we all talk about freedom, but does it justify what or how we should act with love? it’s funny that i had a conversation about this with my roommate last night. she asked me, “Where do you think is the best place to look for love?” and without hesitation, i simply said, “Anywhere outside America.” and she stated that i was right and how come she never thought about it before.
every relationship that i’ve seen here always had that slim chance of survival. like it has some kind of a lifespan, most commonly, by months. of course, i’m not saying everyone’s like this, and that some couples have been together for years. and yes, a lot are married too. but why do we get so much splits? because that boy frank next door just looked hotter than you man? or that blonde “bombshell” that walks by looks so much more attractive than your own wife who gave you kids, or you girlfriend whom you chased for some months now? is it because of physical attraction? is it because you believe your current partner’s not really “the one” for you but you still went for him/her anyway? which one is it really?
i figured it’s sometimes true when they say that human nature has this: we always want what we cannot have. or…maybe, once we already have it, we suddenly want more. ok, so if this nature is embedded in us, then probably there’s nothing more we could do or preach about. Love in this country seems so complicated and so complex. that’s probably why there’s a lot of love quotes everywhere, so to serve as a little reminder of how jacked up this place is.
mistrust is the motto here. but i can’t and i won’t blame you. because i would do the same thing too, unless i’m proven wrong. on the other hand, i would definitely compliment America on a lot of grounds, particularly the economic level, social status, equal opportunity, etc. but you do a lot of taking care of other things, before looking at the one right next to you.
love is such a beautiful thing. don’t throw it away. because one day you’ll get tired of starting all over again in each “new relationship” you get into. treasure what you have already and make the most of this love.
